Cycle 3, day 1. Here I sit in my infusion chair (a private one this time, just luck of the draw), port accessed, and the pre-meds on their way through my system. While it’s a four-hour process, it isn’t awful. The infusion nurses are just amazing and kind, my husband is here (now on a Starbuck’s run, I send him out when they access my port), and I have a bag of projects and goodies to keep me occupied. It’s probably the most socialization I get in this entire process.
Yesterday marked the official halfway point and today marks the beginning of the second half of chemo. After today, I get to say, “one more chemo; one more first Thursday to go; one more bad day like this one.” That’s kind of a beautiful thing. Even though I know what to expect, and that the latter part of this week and most of next week will pretty much suck, I only have to go through that once more. Yes, the effects are cumulative, so I might experience increased symptoms, but it all comes with the territory. I saw an anonymous quote yesterday as I was perusing Pinterest for some pre-chemo inspiration that said “I didn’t come this far to only come this far.” Damn straight.
I also learned from another survivor about a group called “Chemo Angels” (http://www.chemoangels.com/) that I applied for and was accepted into, where during chemo you are assigned two volunteers who send you notes and small gifts to brighten your chemo days. What a great idea. I hope someday I can pay it forward as a volunteer myself. The notes and gifts should start arriving just as my side effects are at their worst, so thank goodness for timing.
I have started to give some thought to the small things I may be able to do in the break between chemo and radiation (assuming the break is more than the three weeks after my last chemo) and to what I can do during radiation, since I won’t have to worry as much about my immunity or the side effects of chemo, even though radiation will bring its own side effects that I understand can also be unpleasant and include fatigue. But the idea of being able to go to Verizon and upgrade my cell phone or get new glasses sounds pretty great right now.
One step at a time, one chemo at a time, and I’ll get through this.