The Slog

Cycle 3, day 5. Not a great few days. I didn’t even get the usual half-day of energy I have gotten in the past few cycles on the day after chemo. In fact, I was back in the infusion suite two days after my infusion in order to get IV rehydration for three hours. So, to say that this has not been fun is a vast understatement. Thankfully, they managed to get me rehydrated, the cause of the dehydration has subsided, and now I just have typical awful post-chemo, “can’t find a place to be comfortable” misery and everything tastes pretty bad. While I don’t seem to have the bone pain back, I am fully experiencing the cumulative nature of the side effects.

Today, I looked at a photo of myself with my family from last December and saw how happy I seemed and wondered if that person would be back. Just the idea of being able to stand and laugh seems almost inconceivable today.

But… I did get my first “chemo angel” gifts yesterday, along with two cards from friends, and another letter today, and on days like today, those mean so much. They remind me that I’m still part of this world, and that I may only be a few days away from rejoining it. Here’s hoping.

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